Here's my very own personal steps on how not to have a
- Go to the store. See South African grapes on sale
- Spend 10 minutes trying to figure out which sack of grapes have the least mushed up grapes on the vine, only to settle for a prepacked tray
- Take grapes home
- Set grapes (in tray and cling wrap) on counter top, ohh and ahhh at the thought of eating these in front of the telly
- Peal off cling wrap
- Have grapes fall down the counter top to the floor in a cascade of luscious, juicy globes of goodness
- Dance away and backwards to avoid falling grapes, like they were globules of VX gas (See the movie 'The Rock' for vague reference)
- Mash and squish 10 - 15 grapes with step # 7 above
- Stop. Stare. Facepalm at mess
- Spend the next 20 minutes cleaning juice splatter from floor, cupboards and every-god-damn-where else
- Eat remaining 10 grapes
- Rue buying grapes
Dav out
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