Greetings,
Sometimes while in traffic, you think of the weirdest things. Take today for example. Stuck in traffic, MP3's blasting away, and I thought it would be great to have a cannon strapped to my car, firing away at stupid people who were jumping queue's and weaving in and out of traffic.
Then I started wondering about the phrase "Fire at will", and how it differed from "Fire on / at my command". There is a difference! Mostly the first is where you fire away till you're out of ammo / rocks / the kitchen sink, and the other would be fire every time your boss tells you to.
I'd like to coin "Fire at will on my command when you think you've got a firing solution with a 99.9% hit probability". Its got a catchy ring to it.
Dav out
I've got this feeling
That time's just holding me down
I'll hit the ceiling or else
I'll tear up this town
Greetings,
I've taken a look back at blogging and the Bloggosphere (there! I said it!), and for me, I started tapering off blogging right about the time when work swamped me to death (I'd say mid of 2012) and when Blogspot / Blogger / Google changed the blog posting page. Yeah you could do a little more, but something about posting now was a little different, a little.... clinical.
Though don't get me wrong, I love writing.
I've seen a move for more commercial blogs in the past year (and by that I mean 2011 - 2012) and people throttling back on personal / private blogs. This is not necessarily a bad thing.
I've got mobile devices with blog apps, so lets see where and how 2013 turns out.
Dav out
I know
Caught up in the middle
I cry just a little
When I think of letting go
Oh no
Gave up on the riddle
I cry just a little
When I think of letting go
Greetings,
My last post was roughly June 19, 2012. Since then, I've been mainly hiding, because of the cops.
I was hoping to sell my story to MGM or some other movie studio, but then McAfee had to show up and go completely bat-sh*t insane. No one's going to want to buy my story now when compared to his?
 |
| I'm Tony Stark after a weekend of drinking |
I've given up trying to out-bat-shit-insane him. Its just not possible. Or it is, but its not worth my liver.
Trying something else now.
Dav out
Greetings,
I caught this on the news today:
"Starbucks to phase out coloring from crushed beetles"
I'm like, yeah, so maybe its on their logo or on cups or something. Turns out I'm wrong. Oh. So. Wrong.
"Starbucks Corp said on its blog on Thursday that it will stop using a natural, government-approved coloring made from crushed beetles in its strawberry flavoring by late June, bowing to pressure from some vegetarian customers."
Wow. Crushed bugs? Seems like Starbucks has been using the extract in its strawberry frappuccinos and smoothies, as well as some deserts like raspberry swirl cake.
- Lucky I'm not a strawberry frapp kinda guy
- I'm more of a cheese cake person
Turns out that this isn't a new thing.
Wikipedia says that the dye has been in use since the 15th century to dye material a deep crimson colour.
Now, FYI, this is what goes into your drink (ground up of course):
 |
| Shaken, not stirred please |
Once you get over the whole "There's BUGS IN MY COFFEE?" it seems like this is pretty much a normal thing, the US FDA says its ok with them.
 |
| Uh, mom, why's that barista crushing something to a bloody pulp and adding it to my drink? |
Well
veterinarians vegetarians all around the world should be able to breathe a sigh of releif as Starbucks will be amending their recipes to make use of lycopene, a natural, tomato-based extract.
Next we'll have this happen and give up on that as well.
 |
| We should have used beetles instead! |
Dav out
I like it like that!
Hey windows down, chillin’ with the radio on
I like it like that!
Damn, the sun’s so hot, make the girls take it all off
I like it like that!
Yeah, one more time, I can never get enough of everybody
Sing it right back, I like it like that!
Greetings,
Recently I've been peppered by a different kind of pop, namely K-Pop. I blame MTV (MTV Asia to be precise) because they tend to lace their normal music video programms with K-Pop music videos.
From what I've seen so far Korean Pop (K-Pop) comprises of a special formula:
- Male artist - androgynous
- Female artist - as many as you can pack into a bus
- Female artist - legs, as many as you can pack into a bus
- Any artist - must be able to say these words in English - "Yeah. Oh baby. Yes. OK etc"
- Not afraid of glitter and makeup
Seriously, some of these Korean bands have up to 13 members.
Thirteen.
 |
| Hi, can we just have the band in here please? Oh, you ARE the band? |
|
|
|
|
Its not surprising that many of the female bands dress the way they do, its a multi million dollar (Won or Won, you pick) industry. Being sexy translates into more album sales, and more work.
 |
| For the Korean won before the North–South division, see Korean won. |
I'm not going to throw around K Pop band names, that's what Google is there for. Super Junior, Wonder Girls, 4 Minutes by the way are just to name a few. Band shelf life goes from anywhere between 6 months to 10 years, depending on the Scoville scale of how hot you are.
One bit of news I found a little amazing while reading up on K Pop is that there have been plans by
South Korea to weaponize it, just to annoy the hell out of North Korea. Just imagine playing
Avicii - Levels, over and over again just because your idiot neighbor does home improvement work on a Sunday morning.
 |
These aren't cute girls, they're actually Voltron in disguise.
You just need to know how to assemble them the right way |
I think the boots market should be doing very well in Korea.
Dav out
Greetings,
I use a
LOT of Excel in my everyday life. I blame work (of course I blame a lot of things on work, but that's for another blog post).
 |
| Crazy, but not that crazy |
Excel makes things..orderly. Order is good! Order is next to Godliness I hear. Anyway, I'm sidetracking.
I periodically (re: every Friday) send out an email to some of the guys at work with some weekend music, and after a while I was receiving requests for spesific songs and couldn't keep track of what I've sent out and what I had cued on for the following weeks.
Cue Excel!
So from a 3 column sheet, I progressed on to a 8 column Excel sheet, and more importantly, a drop down for song status where I could select 'Sent' or 'Not Sent'.
After a while (22 new rows) I was sorting each row by Status and I realised the way I was managing the 'Sent' status could be done in a more logical, automatic manner. So I fired up Google and looked up IF statements as well as Nested Statments.
Microsoft's Help page was not so much help because I was not looking for a complex macro. About.com's page on nested IF statements hit the nail on the head for me.
This page had a simple to understand example, and got me thinking that I could just simplify an IF formula in Excel to do what I wanted.
My requirements were simple, if I put in a date in a column (Sent Date), I wanted the column (Sent Status) to change to "Sent". If there was no date value, I'd want the column to say "Not Sent".
Warning, formula below!
=IF([@Date]> 1,"Sent", "Not Sent")
Sample excel below FYI
http://www.mediafire.com/?ksktpp1aqraljxg
So I've nerded out this week. I am ashamed.
Dav out
I resolve to call her up a thousand times a day
Ask her if she'll marry me
in some old fashioned way
But my silent fears have gripped me
long before I reach the phone
And before my tongue has tricked me
Must I always be alone
Greetings,
It's one of those dates that's really memorable. Pretty neat date / time, the next we'll have would be next year when its 12/12/12, 12:12:12. So we've almost maxed out the 12 hour count, lets enjoy it while we're able to. Another added advantage is that its a Friday, so TGIF.
 |
| Shown - cool date and time. Not shown - the crazy drinking planned for later |
Stay safe people!
Dav out
Greetings,
Well, now that we've set the tone below (that I'm playing Fallout: New Vegas), I think its safe for me to come out with my very own New Vegas drinking game. I'm pretty sure someone's done this before (no, I haven't Googled it just yet) but here's my spin on things. We'll be using tequila shots to measure the potency of each item, ranging between 1 to 5 shots (at 5 shots, you're the winner, champ!). So get that bottle of José Cuervo (aged, none of that white clear stuff) and your shot glasses, because we're headed to New Vegas!
Note: Drink sensibly.
Note # 2: I just noticed the almost pun (really?), Mexico, tequila, Vegas... you feeling
this?
1. Take a shot every time you shoot a coyote or scorpion (any type)
This might be a small problem, because at some point in time, you'll end up killing quite a few of these pesky critters (see Hidden Valley, huge spawn point).
Potency: 3 shots of tequila
2. Take a shot every time you run out of ammo (of any type - bullets or energy weapons)
VERY small chance. You might run out of ammo for ONE specific weapon you might have on you, but you're almost never dry in this game. Unless you're
that guy that insists on carrying one weapon and it runs empty during a run in with a Deathclaw. Bye, it was nice knowing you.
Potency: 1 shot of tequila (and maybe some milk on the side)
3. Take a shot every time you hear a profanity
DANGER Will Robinson! This might put you over. I cant remember what the rating is on this game, but the colourful language will make it hard to stay sober. Or pick fights with your TV.
Potency: 4 shots of tequila (and a body shot)
4. Take a shot every time you hear an NPC say "Patrolling the Mojave almost makes you wish for a nuclear winter" (or something alike)
I'm sorry ma'am, your son died while playing a drinking game based on New Vegas. There's not much left of him, his body burst into flames when we tried to pry him out of the couch. He was just
that flammable.
No,
seriously.
They say these phrases ALL the time! Among others:
-
When I got this assignment I was hoping there would be more gambling.
- We won't go quietly, the legion can count on that
- Ave. True to Caesar.
Since the longest gaming run I've had so far has been 6 hours, I've been tortured over and over again with these lines (I'm on the NCR end by the way). At one point, I saved the game, and then went all Apocalypse Now in an NCR encampment.
That was satisfying.
Potency: 5 shots of tequila
and Charlie Sheen crazy eyes thrown into the mix. Good luck and god bless you my son.
So, now you're drunk, and you're crazy like Charlie Sheen. Congrats.
Me, I'm going to play me some more Fallout New Vegas!
Dav out
Nevermind
I’ll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best
For you too
Don’t forget me
I beg
I’ll remember you said
Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead
Greetings,
I got held up in traffic the other day, mainly because there was a building fire close to where I live. What got to me was the new fire department uniforms. For some reason, it looks like we've roped in Andy Warhol (and maybe his weight in coke) to design these colour swatches.
You call that a colour pallet?
I can't understand what they were going for. Fire cameo? If it was me, and I was headed into a blazing inferno, I'd like to do it knowing that if I fell over or something, that my buddies would be able to find me in all that smoke and flames and stuff. That's why a lot of first responders and other jobs that require high visibility get issued clothing with luminescent strips. So that they are
visible.
Lets look at a simple comparison here. I'd make a uniform that stands out in a fire. A fire where, the bulk of the basic colours you'll be seeing would be either red, orange, red AND orange, and thereabouts.
Bob, Bob! What are you DOING? I can clearly see the guy through all those flames! Jesus man, what have you been smoking?
So lets go with what we have instead:
Oh. My. God. Bob, that is PERFECT! Lets just add in a little more red and orange, and we can safely camouflage ourselves in that fire!
Well I'm pretty sure that will work out real well in practice.
Damn, I should have put on my smoking jacket instead
Dav out
I know the things you wanted
They're not what you have
With all the people talkin'
It's driving you mad
Greetings,
Well its all over the news by now, but those fake Apple 'Stores' in China are being closed down as we speak. Oddly, they are being closed because some of them do not have a license to operate, and not because they are infringing on any rights of the principal company.
Is this a case of 'creative license' gone too far in terms of mimicking an Apple store, or is really more of "imitation is the best form Of flattery"?
Kudos to the
original blogger that brought this to light, but I'm pretty sure this was already known by the locals though no one really bothered to act on it.
Strangely so, Apple has also been mum on this. As long as they are selling genuine products maybe?
*shrug* Welcome to the new world order.
Dav out
Greetings,
The recent news on people brought up for wrong doing (during work at an ex company location) has me thinking, is there even a statute of limitations on what you've done, and if there is, how long back does it go?
Alcatel Lucent, NoW and other companies are feeling the brunt of these issues, but its the people working under the management that's being offered as sacrificial lambs. I'm not saying that these people DIDN'T know what they were doing, but in some cases its what you do on a day to day basis at work and never really think about it later.
No, I don't go around bribing people nor do I hack phones. Haxx0r!
Its just, how long back in time do the need to look before they find something incriminating? I don't want someone to go back 15 years in my past and say they found me drinking a can of Coke at my first job as a store boy just because someone dusted off a VHS of a security cam.
Its an interesting notion, but its something I'm trying not to dwell on.
Dav out
Overheard
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
| Author:
Dav
Greetings,
Overheard @ the restrooms of a hotel after a business meeting:
[A] Uh, this Thursday, besides the afternoon, when else are you free?
[B] Well, the morning I guess.
[A] That's no good. I'm meeting someone in the morning. What about later?
[B] Um, no, I'm not going to be in the office during the afternoon. You already know this.
[A] Ah, yeah. Hey, what about 2pm then? The client's available at 2pm.
[B] I'll text you, ok?
Now, let me be clear. I'm one of those people who think personal time at the restroom / urinals is just that, personal time. Don't encroach on it by striking up a conversation with me, even more so something related to work.
The thing is, guy [A] obliviously did not really grasp what 'afternoon' means. Or perhaps in their environment its something else all together.
For me, afternoon is anything after 12pm (or 1200 hours). Guy [B] must have had enough and couldn't concentrate on the job at hand, hence him agreeing to what came across as absurd to me.
*shrug* I'm just saying, you know?
Dav out
I remember how we used to talk
about the places we would go when we were off
and all that we were gonna find.
And I remember our seeds grow
and how you cried when you saw
the first leaves show.
The love was pouring from your eyes.
Greetings,
Here's my very own personal steps on how not to have a
grape great day:
- Go to the store. See South African grapes on sale
- Spend 10 minutes trying to figure out which sack of grapes have the least mushed up grapes on the vine, only to settle for a prepacked tray
- Take grapes home
- Set grapes (in tray and cling wrap) on counter top, ohh and ahhh at the thought of eating these in front of the telly
- Peal off cling wrap
- Have grapes fall down the counter top to the floor in a cascade of luscious, juicy globes of goodness
- Dance away and backwards to avoid falling grapes, like they were globules of VX gas (See the movie 'The Rock' for vague reference)
- Mash and squish 10 - 15 grapes with step # 7 above
- Stop. Stare. Facepalm at mess
- Spend the next 20 minutes cleaning juice splatter from floor, cupboards and every-god-damn-where else
- Eat remaining 10 grapes
- Rue buying grapes
Dav out
Greetings,
Has anyone ever
watched this movie?
America 3000. It must be, and this comes from watching
Flash Gordon many, many times, the most camp-est (is that a real word?) movie ever!
I watched it, and of course I overanalyzed it by wondering what the females did if they had a male child (toss him out I guess?), how the male's reproduced (from tossed aside male children?) and if the females were hell bent on killing the males in wars, then why not fix the problem at the root, stop tossing out male kids maybe?
UNLESS! Unless they knew it was some how related to perhaps a 'rule of diminishing returns' that if they started killing males and / or male children, they wouldn't have any more breeding stock?
Uh, sir, I think that' way too much analysisAll in all, I enjoyed the movie enough to want to hunt down a copy of Flash Gordon for a great movie weekend.
Now where did I save that torrent application again.....
Dav out
Greetings,
That's it, its official! Charlie Sheen's out, Ashton Kutcher is in.
.....
Its a break from the norm, I know, but its all
over the news!
Ashton Kutcher has like, a
bajilion Twitter fans. I think the big thing producers from the Two and a Half Men sitcom are aiming for would be for him to be able draw in his large younger following to the series. Not to say its a great idea, but just how are they going to write him in?
I've never been a fan of the series, in fact I've only watched it on and off as it is. I never quite found it funny, then again I'm not a die hard Sheen fan as most of the hardcore viewers are (or were?).
What I'm sure of is that Charlie Sheen wouldn't be too happy to hear this. Ashton you've just made a new enemy, one with tiger blood and Adonis DNA.
Would be pretty good to see what goes on now online.
Dav out
Can you meet me halfway, right at the borderline
That's where I'm gonna wait, for you
I'll be lookin' out, night n'day
Took my heart to the limit, and this is where I'll stay
Greetings,
I frequently laze around the house
sans watch. I've enough references to the current time as it is (wall clock, 2 phones with huge time displays, the TV, set-top box etc) that I rarely feel the need to wear a watch at home.
The thing is, sometimes I head off to lunch (this is mostly over the weekends) or off to something or another, and I realize that I've gone off without my watch.
For some
odd reason, I find it weird not having a watch on but only when I'm out. Its a somewhat . . . . naked feeling. At the same time, when you're out somewhere, and you make that very natural wrist tilt to look at your watch, and then realize its not there. That's ok, till you catch a glimpse of a few people wondering what you're up to.
I think I'm starting to see a wrist watch as something to keep my wrist occupied.
Lets not talk about people with wrist watches that do
EVERYTHING and also brew coffee.
Dav out
Greetings,
Have you ever taken time off to think about how rough your local coffee Barista has it?
He (or she) has to put up with line after line of pompous, pretentious coffee and tea guzzling drones, each with a unique but not almost on the menu order. I've always wondered how they cost and calculate revenue for a normal Chai latte when someone comes up to the counter and asks for half half cream with two pumps of Chai, one shot of expresso and a twist of lemon.
Is that
even tea anymore?
But I digress!
A recent study has shown that
sex and coffee may 'trigger a stroke'.
. . . . . . . .
I'll let that sink in for a while.
Your local Barista's life has just become a little more darker and colder now after seeing that in the BBC news. Of course, blowing your nose might even do you in, but lets not worry about that shall we? ;)
Dav out
Ja ja jaded
You got yo mama's style
But you're yesterday's child to me
So jaded
You think that's where it's at but is that where it's supposed to be
Trolling
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
| Author:
Dav
Greetings,
Just felt like trolling around today. And since I haven't gotten off my Inception kick yet, I present you with the below!
Dav out
Greetings,
Really unrelated to anything I've posted before, but I was reading about tigers and the wild, and then I found a post about a
tigress eating her cub. Wiki-crack (yes, its a word!) and I found Ranthambhore (its a tiger sanctuary!) and then I came across the fun fact that Katy Perry and British comedian Russell Brand were married there (October 23, 2010).
Then, via the amazing powers of Google, I came across the picture above. Look at them. Hell, look at HIM.
So, why's the universe askew now?
Dav out
To be a joke and look, another line without a hook
I held you close as we both shook for the last time take a good hard look!
Greetings,
Thought I'd try a funny pun to the title. It is of course, in reference to
this issue. Imagine finding that in your morning breakfast toast, or your evening munchies sammich!
What I find odd is that the interview has him saying he took extra care to check the slices of bread... AFTER he found that there was a mouse at the bottom of the loaf?
Also, who buy's bread online? Am I the only guy that finds that a little weird?
*shrug*
Our furry friend taking a long nap
Dav out
